DEDICATION
I dedicate this book to my best friend.
their are times when doubt and loneliness creep in, but every word,every look, and every memory is a continuous reminder that nothing
bad is going to happen to us. Thank you Dani.
I love you, Soul Sister.
(This cover is temporary, i am going to make my own cover eventually... i will try.)
This book is kind of personal to me. but i am willing to share it, this explains how i feel in detail. even if the character isn't me.

Crying in the inside is horridly worse
than crying on the outside.
Chapter 1
This, I thought, is the sound of nothing.
nothing is empty.
nothing is cold.
nothing is silent.
I opened my eyes, i felt like i was in nothingness. and coldness surrounded me. I felt the world closing in around me. I needed air.than i heard a faint whisper, Joy. Joy. JOY. JOY! I bursted out of the nothingness and breathed heavily, slowly the voices of the people flooded in,and instead of floating in nothingness i was shivering in the indoor pool at Glackys. Ipulled myself out of the pool. I Have really light brown hair, sometimes its blond. and skin the color of a twelve year olds coffee. (Trust me,i am not even twelve yet and i only like coffee when its lighter brown color with lots of
milk.) and I have brown eyes. Woopedy doo. i have one sister and four brothers. I normally think a lot. and My
name is Frankie Joy. DONT MAKE ME SAY MY FULL FIRST NAME!. My mood felt not as great as before, my encounter with nothingness had given me a strange feeling. i dried myself off with a towel and pulled my hoodie over my damp swimsuit.than walked out of the pool room and out of glackeys. The clouds were grey and it was cold and foggy out, the colorful autumn leaves looked old ad dull. pulled my rollerblades and strapped them tight. then i pushed off the sidewalk and skated down the street making my way to the old park. Me and my bestfriend, Maxi , Always met there at three in the afternoon and my watch say two forty five. A lot of times i would just go out and walk or skate or bike to think because my thoughts never stopped begging for attention, Most times i didnt even hear my music i had put on because i would just start thinking, And suddenly my thoughts led me too a old memories and i immediatly gave myself in to it.
It was Friday, june 17th 2019 and me and maxi had been friends for a year and we finally convinced our parents to let us have a sleepover, it was at maxis house. and i
walked up to it and breathed in the fresh air, I knocked on the door excitedly, and it swung open and Maxi bounced out grinning.”Hi Frankie! Mama Frankie is here! she is here! here!” She yelled excitedly,she grabbed my hand an pulled me inside. I remember smelling cinnamon and pumpkin.I remember shaking hands with her mom and curtsying, I remember the picture of a cat with a bowtie on the wall, I remember her moms apron that said BAKING MOM in big letters on it. I remember gathering my senses and blabbing on about everything, i remembered pasta and i remembered her dad coming in her room in his bathrobe and yelling.”Welcome home Frankie!” I remember Maxi laughing and giving and embarrassed grin.I remember crying at one in the morning because i couldn’t see. i remember yelling “I cant see its nothing its gone!” and crying, I remember Maxi crawling out from her bed and comforting.”No, see i am still here the darkness will be gone soon its not nothing its okay,” I remember her
saying. And I remember staying up the rest of the night with maxi giggling and crying, I remember how the next day her mom bought five packets of glow sticks the next days and how i slept over three more nights and how we both cried when i had to leave.
I remember.
My lips formed into a melancholy smile.I turned abruptly to go across the road without looking for cars i glided into the road. and i suddenly felt a sharp pain. I got the feeling of falling and felt cold. i looked to my side and saw a car coming.my body felt numb and i couldnt move, the car kept moving and my hearing was muffled. I heard the car honk and than somebody yell. And suddenly maxi ran out and grabbed me and yanked me out of the way. the world went spinning and the car flew by.”What the heck!? Are you okay?! I thought you were a goner! Frankie??? Frankie!” She yelled shaking me. I gathered myself and began to tremble. I saw tears in her eyes. “I am Okay.” I whispered/”What happened?” She asked.” I don’t know>” She just stared at than led me up the hill to her house, because it ahd started raining. we went in her house and up to her bedroom,
she plopped down onto her bed and i sat down."what happened out there?" she asked i a cold serious tone."I might bever let you out alone again!" She said in a funny. I gave a fake smile. True as it is; I had no idea what happened and i was actually really scared. "I was skipping a song on my phone." I lied. I hardly ever lied to Maxi- but i dont want her to worry so it was a kind act... right? I heard rain pelting on the sides of her house."Its really raining hard." I changed the subject. "Yeah." she said absently, and shot me a suspicious look. we started to talk about school, and made some bracelets. but i hadn't been paying much attention and when her mom brought us rice krispies-homemade. i only glnaced at them, "I should get going." I said and i started to cry a little. what was going on? I turned away from her. "Is everything Okay?" she placed a and on my shoulder. I nodded and hugged her. "Do you need a ride? its pretty nasty out." I shook my head and smiled.
"Bye love you! text me later." She grinned, " Love you." I said and snuck past Maxi's mom. I slipped out the door and put my roller blades back on, turned on a song that was catchy and had a sort of angry vibe to it and sung along. i took the long way home. "YO OLIVIA RODRIGO!!" Some boy yelled from his porch, howling with laughter. I swelled up with fury. I clicked my hedphones to pause the music, and i threw my arms out to balance myself from falling and he snickered. i slammed my foot down on the brake. "Shut Up!" I yelled angrily, shocking myself. the boy just snickered again and mimicked me singing. I scowled."Mama's boy." I muttered. The boy froze, and stood with a hurt expression for reasons i didn't understand. I scowled and raced off down the sidewalk on my skates. I finally reached my house and kicked my skates off. My Brothers were yelling downstairs and my baby brother was crying, and my big sister was complaining to mom
I ran up the stairs and slammed my rooms door. I sighed and plopped down on my bed. Just as i was about to turn my phone on, My brother burst into my room. "DINNER!" I scowled."Ever heard of knocking?!" Kenji shook his head vigoursly,his dark hair fallingover his eyes, he ran down the hall.I sighed, and jumped off my bed and started down the hall, but i ran into Regginold. "Watch it!!"I yelled. and ran down the stairs. Ashley stopped me,and pulled onmy shirt, "Can you help me with my homework?" She begged "Nobody else will!" I sighed. "Kenji said that its dinner." I said. Ashley shook her head."Mama is still making it." I sighed."So he lied again. Pfft. I guess i-" Suddenly laughter erupted from upstairs. and Ashley giggled and darted upstairs.
I ran after her and found the all huddled in a circle giglging." Give it back!" I yelled furiously,trying to pry my Diary from their grubby fingers."This is hilarious!" Ashton said . 'Give it!!" I saidpushing ashton away and grabbing my diary "HEY!! FINDERS KEEPERS!!" i scowled back at ashton: "Losers weepers!" he jumped on me and started attacking as Kenji laughed hystarically and Ashley stared. "Get off of me!!" I shrieked. Ashton tried to pry the bookfrom my hands, "What the heck is going on in here?!" Reggie yelled. We all froze. "Frankie called him a Dipstick and then smacked him!" Kenji blurted. I stood up angrily."You little Liar! get out of my room, get out of m house, GET OUT OF MY LIFE!!" I screamed angrily. "Francesca joy kolite!!" Mom yelled from my doorway.
I froze."Stay here until i call for you' she said coldly, in a dissapointed voice.they all left and i closed my door Then mom came back, "No phone" She took it away and closed the door. I sighed. I collapsed on my bed. Tryingto cry. i knew i needed to but it just didn't work. so i turned my radio-clock on and listened to my favorite station. I drew with pen on my hand, (do not do this it won't come off for a lil while) But i did it anyway. I doodled. cleaned my room, I actually did my homework, anything to get my mind of what happened earlier, and the growing uneasiness in the pit of my stomach
I painted my nails baby blue, and i even danced to the radio. I wrote down the lyrics of the songs, and after what seemed like forever (it was only an hour) My mom came in, "Your dinner is on the table." I slowly walked downstairs, ignoring the looks from my siblings, who were done eating. I ate the chilly slowly. then i walked upstairs and got ready for bed, which tookme forever. after that i tried to get in bed so i could play a game on my phone but I kept on adjusting things because i was worried that the would fall off of wherever they were, and i seperated the cords on my floor, worrying the carpet would make them catch on fire ,and they weren't even plugged in, i had know idea why i was doing it and i didn't want too but i did it anyway. I was up for 2 hours doing that.
Then i really wanted to cry. but tears still wouldn'tcome. I stayed up doing those things for hours and once i actually gointo bed it was 11:40 PM. I hugged my teddy bear and tried to cry. but i could not, tears only rimmed my eyes and no further, i never got to go on my phone, i had school tommorow and it was late.I used to do these things before but only a tad bit. I had finished getting ready for bed at 9:40 PM. I fell asleep fast.
Chapter 2
Things rushing in faster then heavy nothingness
The next morning i woke up with a headache. And i staggered down the stairs, ate some cerel, and got ready and went off to school, I waited at the bus stop for a feww minutes and once the bus came i walked in and started turn toward the middle, the seats me and Maxi always sat in, But when i did i didn't find the seat empty waiting for me, I found Maeve Zehn sitting in my seat next to Maxi. And everything suddenly got awkward. Maybe she was just sitting there temporarily, like she just wanted to say something to maxi.
I Thought. Maxi smiled happily." Hey Frankie Hankie!!" She said. She called me Frankie Hankie ever since the second grade when i had a awful cold and had to carry a hankerchief with me a whole week and a half, til it finnally let off. It made me smile to know it didn't embarrass her to say that in frontof other poeple. In exchange for that nickname i called her "Maxi Taxi" Because she always wanted to ride around town in them, she said it would make her feel so grown up. "Hi Maxi Taxi," I said grinning. "Is it okay if Maeve sits with me today? We have soemthing we are talking about and i promise to catch up with you later." Maxi said casually as she tied her curly black hair up in a ponytale."I guess its okay" I said shifting uncomfortably."Okay!! see you in history!" I nodded and
And made my way to the back and plopped down with a quiet sigh.
. . .
I checked my phone, 10:43 AM. I sighed an slammed my locker door, wondering where Maxi was. I was just about to start walking to my science class but someone grabbed my arm and slammed me against the wall."WHAT THE-" i started, but then i stopped. It was the Mama's boy. "Get away from me!" I said angrily. I looked around desperatley, Where was Maxi? "Take it back!" The boy gritted his teeth. He had black eyes and black hair in the strangest hairstyle, and dark skin,
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DEDICATION
I dedicate this book to my best friend.
their are times when doubt and loneliness creep in, but every word,every look, and every memory is a continuous reminder that nothing
bad is going to happen to us. Thank you Dani.
I love you, Soul Sister.
(This cover is temporary, i am going to make my own cover eventually... i will try.)
This book is kind of personal to me. but i am willing to share it, this explains how i feel in detail. even if the character isn't me.

Crying in the inside is horridly worse
than crying on the outside.
Chapter 1
This, I thought, is the sound of nothing.
nothing is empty.
nothing is cold.
nothing is silent.
I opened my eyes, i felt like i was in nothingness. and coldness surrounded me. I felt the world closing in around me. I needed air.than i heard a faint whisper, Joy. Joy. JOY. JOY! I bursted out of the nothingness and breathed heavily, slowly the voices of the people flooded in,and instead of floating in nothingness i was shivering in the indoor pool at Glackys. Ipulled myself out of the pool. I Have really light brown hair, sometimes its blond. and skin the color of a twelve year olds coffee. (Trust me,i am not even twelve yet and i only like coffee when its lighter brown color with lots of
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